Nowadays, among some young women, the goal of choosing a mate has turned to “second-hand men”.
They are likely to assume that middle-aged divorced men will learn the lessons of a failed marriage and become “the new good guy.”
Although people have their own tastes, it is best to be cautious about investing in a second-hand man who has been married before.
Objectively speaking, “second-hand men”, having learned from the failure of their first marriage, will be more careful in choosing their second marriage, so as not to repeat the mistakes.
Because of the accumulation of the first marriage, they gradually understand women’s hearts, will know more about women’s needs and wants, perhaps have a marriage experience will cherish the family life more.
They have the incomparable poise and maturity of young people, are more considerate, have a certain economic independence, and have a certain social status, but also more realistic, more lethal and dangerous.
To this end, young women should not only recognize the advantages of second-hand men, but also be careful about the disadvantages of second-hand men. First of all, they should ask themselves whether they can face and accept their disadvantages.
So what are the disadvantages of being a second-hand man?
Weakness 1: Fear of marriage.
Once bitten by a snake, one fears a coiled rope for the next ten years./Once bitten, twice shy.
Because of the failure of the first marriage and fear of the second harm, so that the tendency to not marry or cynicism and game marriage mentality.
Disadvantage 2: Passion and romance will be less and less.
The PERSON ARRIVES MIDDLE AGE, STILL HAVE THE FAILURE OF THE FIRST MARRIAGE, MAKE ONCE PASSION AND ROMANCE ALREADY BY THE LIFE THAT IS WORN OUT AND WORN OUT IS GONE, PASSION AND ROMANCE NATURE ALSO ARRIVE BUT THE REALITY THAT LIVE FAITHFULLY COMES.
Disadvantage # 3: It’s possible to indulge.
Without the constraints of marriage, “one person can feed the whole family”, it is easy to be addicted to love because of all kinds of temptations.
Disadvantage 4: Certain personality flaws may become more prominent.
There is no perfect marriage, no perfect person.
However, there are problems in marriage, and there are more or less defects in personality and handling things. This defect is the result of long-term formation, which cannot be changed in a short time, let alone improved by the arrival of the second marriage.
If anything, it will be in a short period of time. After all, a leopard cannot change its spots.
Disadvantage 5: Become more realistic and Philistine.
Young do not understand love, because of love, the “bread is better than love” look very light, and marriage let people know that love is a luxury, only bread is the real life.
External factors such as power and wealth impact and threat to marriage, and property division in divorce are likely to become an unspeakable “pain” in the heart, which will become more realistic and vulgar, and pay more attention to money.
Weakness 6: The inevitable psychology of contrast.
If the second marriage is happier than the first, the contrast will be relatively weakened;
If the second marriage is not as good as the first marriage, it is very difficult to draw a full stop for everything in the past, will often take you and his ex-wife than, as the wife now you may live in the shadow of his ex-wife.
Weakness seven: children and complex family ties.
Marriage doesn’t mean just being with one person, it’s more about being with the sum of one’s background and social connections.
For an unmarried young woman, not yet married to face how to deal with children and family relations, this is originally a test, let alone an easy thing.
In the “second-hand man” there is no lack of many fine works, even the best man.
For young women in the stage of mate selection, although there is no right or wrong love, it is also their right to choose who to be with.
But to know which kind of “second-hand man” is suitable for you?
What kind of ‘second-hand man’ is not right for you?
Before DECIDING TO MARRY “SECOND-HAND MAN”, WANT TO OPEN BIG EYES, HOLD GOOD MEASURE, after all, the ultimate goal of getting married is not to let oneself be hurt?