When we develop a healthy self, it is easier to build a harmonious and happy marriage.
Many students and my clients often ask me a question:
“If I’m going to choose a life partner, what should I pay attention to? What kind of person should I choose?”
I said to them: “You should pay attention to whether this person has three Qs. These three Qs are signs of a healthy self. I said to them: “The three Qs, excluding IQ, are IQ, because usually you The person you love should have an IQ similar to yours.What should you pay attention to when choosing a life partner? Pay attention to these matters and choose the right life partner”
What do these three Qs mean?
The first Q is LQ, LearningQuotient, the learning quotient. Whether a person is a good partner or not, a very important point is whether he has a heart that is willing to learn. I don’t worry about a very confident person, because many of them are really smart and very successful, and he has learned something from his own experience that he can be very proud of. So a person with self-confidence and strong opinions, I am not single.
What I worry about is that when a person sees sufficient evidence, he already knows he is wrong, but he refuses to admit it and still insists that he is right.
What I worry about is that it is difficult for people who feel they know everything and are reluctant to listen to others. Therefore, the most important thing is whether the other party has a willingness to learn.
What is the second Q? It is EQ, emotional intelligence, that is, we must know how to understand our inner emotional world and the inner emotional world of others. Learn to listen and touch the feelings of others. When we do not understand our own inner emotional state, we cannot understand the inner emotional state of others, nor can we establish deep, heart-to-heart relationships with others.
When a person has LQ (Learning Quotient), a willingness to learn, and EQ (Emotional Intelligence), his ability to deal with interpersonal relationships must be very strong. But that’s not enough. Such a person needs the last Q.What should you pay attention to when choosing a life partner? Pay attention to these matters and choose the right life partnerBecause people who are willing to learn and have excellent interpersonal relationships may also become the most controlling and manipulating people in the world, which is terrifying.
Therefore, the third Q, SQ, must be added at the end. What does this SQ mean? It is SpiritualQuotient, the spiritual quotient.
What is a spiritual quotient? I define it as an unbearable heart. A heart that is willing to love others and consider the interests of others; unwilling to sacrifice the interests of others for their own interests. He is always looking for a win-win situation, and while satisfying his own needs, he also wants the needs of others to be met. When he was injured, he was willing to see that there was still room for improvement. When others have not changed, I am willing to love myself first, and I am willing to change first. He knows how to be grateful, and is also a master who is good at constantly discovering and showing the strengths and goodwill of others. This is a very good character.
To develop a healthy Self, we need to develop these three Qs.